My essential childbirth reading list...

Many of my expecting friends who know about my penchant for thoroughly researching everything I attempt have asked me for a reading list of books I found useful during my pregnancy, and particularly with the birthing process, I have been meaning to share this much sooner - but alas, everything going on kept me from posting this until now, I hope that it will at least be somewhat helpful to some of you.

Disclaimer - Chris and I decided early on that we wanted a very particular kind of birthing experience and subsequently focused our research on preparing for that particular experience. In no way do I imply that one way is better than another, rather I believe and hope that every woman should have the birthing experience that she wants.

Our approach...
Around the seventeenth week in the pregnancy, Chris and I finally came to terms with the whole idea that we were in fact pregnant.  I had obviously read some of the required pregnancy reading, none of which I found immensely interesting or useful, most of which I did not finish.  Instead, around this time in the pregnancy, I realized that these 'required readings'  spent way too much time on the pregnancy part, and not nearly enough time on the actual birthing process, except it seemed to discuss all that could go wrong.  This intrigued me, since it seemed that for a generally healthy, educated, non-smoking, logical person - that part kind of takes care of itself, and beyond the 'week-by-week' comparisons to beans and eventually fruits, there was little useful information you could not find with a quick Google search if you needed to. Instead, I started wondering about the decisions we make concerning the birth itself.

After my initial readings on pregnancy and childbirth I became fascinated with the negative connotation surrounding 'labor' and birth. Particularly what concerned me was the overwhelming fear associated with it.  Seemed to me that something that is so part of the natural life cycle, should not be as terrifying as the movies and other popular culture has made it out to be. Add to that the fact that the tight grip of private health care means that women were often not even given the option of a natural child birth, rather the whole process was being treated as some sort of medical intervention instead of the natural part of the life cycle that it is.  So I started reading and doing intense research on why and where this fear came from.  From there I re-focused my own research and preparation on reading texts I found presented childbirth in a positive light, as an intimate experience for mother, baby and birthing partner alike, instead of so many of the books that make it out to be some perverse and unnecessary act that would leave your beloved body forever altered and dignity in tatters. Through my readings I realized that what I was really after was a fear-free (note, not pain free)  'Active Birth' (one that allows the mother to move about freely, eat, use a birthing ball, shower, bath - whatever feels good - as opposed to a more medically-prescribed birth lying on the back on a hospital bed tied to monitors and other devices, watched by hordes of medical staff).

Further down the research process, I discovered HypnoBirthing by chance during an online search and after discussing my initial interest with Chris, I contacted the instructor in the Western Cape who came and did a home-class for Chris and I in January. I was admittedly skeptical, I mean Hypno-anything, we're yuppies not hippies for heavens' sake.  And if I was skeptical, imagine my logically-minded, scientifically-orientated beloved.  We decided to at least give it a go, and to see where it lead.  Without exaggeration, within the scope of 48-hours I had left my own fear of  'labor' behind in lieu of actually looking forward to the birthing process.  And yes, I can honestly say that it works.  I loved my birth and wished that I could do it again.  (More on this in the 'how it happened' installment to follow...)

So without further ado, books I found particularly useful during my preparation include:

1. Active Birth: A new approach to giving birth naturally  - Janet Balaskas  - If you are considering a natural birth, I suggest reading this book first. It is approachable, more up to date than some of the older texts, and presents many useful tips on how to approach the experience including preparation for, and what to expect during birth.  She shares helpful tips on practicalities such as positions and natural pain relief.  Mostly she discusses the reasons for, philosophy for going this route.  
2. Spiritual Midwifery - Ina May Gaskin - A classic must-read for a midwife-led natural childbirth.  It is a more dated text but critical to help us understand what a midwife is, and I particularly appreciated the personal accounts of child birth to get a sense of what you can expect, and how it can be done.  If you can read beyond some of the old colloquialisms like the constant use of 'lady' to refer to the women in the book, look beyond the fact that all those in the book did in fact live in homes that could move around, and stop giggling at the circa 1970s hairstyles and fashion, then this book, even only in part, will open your eyes to the way in which childbirth can be a bonding experience for both mother and partner.   The book has some good photographs and other art to prepare you and your partner, and also a complete guide to DIY childbirth at the back, should you find yourself in the unfortunate position of having to do this yourself on that Memorial Day camping trip in your 34th week. 
3. HypnoBirthing: The Mongan Method, A natural approach to a safe, easier, comfortable birthing - Marie Mongan - The book, along with the training workshops, will introduce you to the notion of using deep relaxation techniques during the birthing process.  But moreover, it presents childbirth in a positive, (dare I say, enjoyable) light, as something to look forward to, and prepare for, instead of fear, dread and wish away.  Perhaps the most important contribution of this approach is the importance of the birthing partner as an advocate, supporter and part of the process.  (I saw this first-hand in Chris' active participation in Luka's birth in Darwin).  The use of affirmations and visualization is of particular importance as a technique currently used by almost every professional athlete in their own preparation for a winning performance.  The book is accompanied by a CD that contains a deep-relaxation (meditation-type) track and one with birthing affirmations (which I listened to on my daily exercise walks and incidentally used during my entire birthing in March). Perhaps not for everybody, but if you truly want a natural, un-medicated birth and (dare I say) enjoy it, I highly recommend at least trying it.  I am sure you can read the book and listen to the disc, but we found the course immensely helpful in allaying many of our fears about childbirth.  I have pretty strong views and thoughts on how HypnoBirthing helped me during my unexpected pre-term labor with Luka who came ten-weeks early. If you are pregnant and would like to chat about it, I'd be happy to give you my two cents - just drop a comment and let me know.
4. The Mama Bamba Way: The Power and Pleasure of Natural Childbirth - Robyn Sheldon - This book by Cape Town midwife, this book is a more spiritual approach to the birthing process.  Drawing on both ancient traditions and with a heavy focus on women's innate wisdom and ability to accomplish a comfortable birth, this book also does wonders to allay the inherent fear factor surrounding child birth.  A tad on the spiritual side for me in the beginning (with Chakras and other things I am not that familiar with), but in the end a good read for the personal accounts and reaffirmations of the innate ability of a woman to birth the baby inside her (without unnecessary medical interventions).

Other books I had ordered and looked forward to reading during my final weeks of pregnancy, but never did because of Luka's pressing need to arrive in time for mothers' day include: 

1. The Birth Partner, Third Edition: A Complete Guide to Childbirth for Dads, Doulas, and All Other Labor Companions
2. The Baby Catcher: Chronicles of a Modern Midwife

The books contained in this list helped me to accomplish the birth that I really wanted.  Again, this is not to say that this is the right way, or that my way is better, rather that this is the way that I wanted to, and was fortunate enough to, experience birth.  I wish every woman the right and privilege of birthing her baby the way in which she wants to, however that may be.  I only wish we were not so pre-programmed to be afraid of this wonderfully empowering experience.